Q: What do you value most in life?
A: Time, especially of the alone variety. There is nothing as underrated as this rare, precious commodity. I cannot, in any sense, understand 'people who need people'. I don't agree with Barbara. They are not 'the luckiest people in the world'. The ability to be alone is a gift. I firmly believe that being able to be alone makes you a better person to be around (later). You. Yes, you. I don't think anything makes me a better person to be around. Well, maybe really strong valium and really strong alcohol that doesn't make you feel queasy.
Q: What do you think is the greatest invention in your life and why?
A: A camera that listens to voice controls. My Samsung. I think I would have given up blogging in pure frustration by now if I still had to go through the dance that was taking selfies on my old camera and transferring the images through seven devices to get to the final destination—the blog.
Q: What do you think is the secret to a good life?
A: Taking it very, very seriously. I mean taking it very, very not seriously. It's all absurd, you know? Everything we do, all the things we get upset or worked up about. All ridiculous. The secret is to realise there is no 'point' and just go with the flow. Do what makes you happy. Do not put up with things in your life that make you unhappy. Also realise that happiness itself as a goal is unrealistic. Aim for content, because somedays you will need to be sad, and that is okay. All fine advice that I never follow.
Q: What would you most like to be remembered for when you’re gone?
A: My elaborate gothic-style gravestone (read memorial), and how they had to find homes for three hundred assorted cats and dogs they found in my self-designed and cantilevered house when someone finally realised they hadn't seen me out and about in the street, yelling at urchins in my velour dressing gown and Irregular Choice shoes from 2017, for the last couple of weeks. Poor emergency service staff! The sight that will greet them of the parts munched on by family pets will be unnerving. There will, of course, also be the seventeen unpublished volumes of my PhD on consumerism and the ideal 'I' of celebrity as identity building blocks; illustrated in the works of Chuck Palahniuk, Neil Gaiman, Charles Dickens and the fashion blogging community, with several divergent explorations of the replacement of God by Corporations, and the effect of fatherlessness on male violence. Most people won't read them though.
Q: What accomplishment in your life are you most proud of?
A: Oh, gosh? Um? I've made it this far. That's pretty good. Maybe it's that, for the most part, I have lived, what would the word be, honestly? authentically? I haven't done what was expected, just because it is. I travelled, I didn't go to university until I was old (best time), I probably didn't get the best job I could have to make the most amount of money, I'm not married (still, and that was a bad idea), I don't have a house or kids, I don't live with my partner of four years just because that is what you 'are supposed to do' (I would have to murder him, even though I love him lots, if we co-habitated and had the potential to completely infuriate each other). I did what I thought was right for me at the time, I tried to do what I thought was morally right. I tried to be kind and tolerant (unless you're in my space!!) Maybe it's not all roses, all the time, at this end of that, but doing it differently wouldn't have, I don't think, changed that. I ruminate too much for anything to ever be all roses!
Who wore it better?
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